9 Things I've Learned About Break Ups

1. Nothing Lasts Forever

That includes relationships and also in turn heart ache. Everyone remembers their first proper heart break. Mine was when I was 16. I really felt I would never be happy again.  I remember I couldn't watch anything with love in cause it made me so sad so I just watched Two and a Half Men repeats and the first film I could stomach was Clueless. Its painful but you do get over it. 
Since then I've had my heart broken a thousand times but I'm here and I'm still ok. 

2. Take Your Time To Mourn

Its ok to be sad after a break up, even if the other person behaves like they don't. In my experience they are usually faking it till they make it anyway but I give myself a day to be sad and then I work on bettering myself. Break up's are not easy. You don't say goodbye to a partner, you say goodbye to a friend and lots of could be's, what ifs and plans that never came to surface, you deserve to fully mourn that in your own time.

3. Avoid Your Ex

I truly believe in cutting all contact once you know its over. I also highly recommend removing them from social media. I don't believe it is 'petty' or 'sad'. If you don't want to see what someone is up to, you shouldn't have to in fear of how you might be perceived, this goes for ex friends too. I don't believe in the idea of keeping them there so they can see how 'happy' you are. If you are faking being happy for someone else's benefit you are never going to be truly happy and you will never move on
Obviously this is so hard to do if you hang around with the same people or if you work together. 
Where you can and where possible don't be around them.

4. Your Girlfriends Are Your Soulmates

To quote Sex and The City "Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just to have fun with". Your girls will get you through a break up. They will remind you when you are sad how much better you are without them and they will be always there to pick up the pieces. Never take them for granted.

5. Move On In Your Own Time

Its not a race to see who can move on the quickest. If they have, leave them be. Its beyond hard seeing someone you care about with someone else especially if its soon after but if you don't feel ready don't force it. That saying "The best way to get over someone is get under someone" is horse shit. Don't do it to make someone jealous, it does more harm in the long run and it really doesn't change anything.

6. Always Take The High Ground

Don't call names, don't send abuse, don't write badly about on social media. Sometimes you just fall out of love and its not something you can control or prevent and its not something we cause, its just a fact about life. Getting angry will change nothing.

7. Take Time To Focus on You

Time you would have usually spent on a partner, now spend on you. If you weren't treated the way you deserved take that time to treat yourself better now. Re-organise your life, your room, your wardrobe. Try a new hobby, book a holiday or a weekend away. No one else to go with? Go exploring by yourself. Eat healthier, join the gym or start to exercise more. Think Khloe Kardashian and her revenge body after Lamar. 
And read my tips on how to love yourself a little better here.

8. The Cliches Are True

There are plenty more fish in the sea. Time does heal all wounds. Things will get better. Sometimes their annoying to hear but one day you'll look back you will realise they are true. Think to yourself, is this really going to matter in a year. Life is extremely short please don't spend the majority of it crying over fuck boys. 

9. There's No Such Thing As Closure

Sometimes you don't get closure or know what went wrong or why it ended. Sometimes it just ends and you don't get your answers and it doesn't have a big discussion as to why it didn't work. Sometimes you just have to move on for you. You might not get an apology for being cheated on or the other person stopped trying. You just have to forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace.

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