Its a been a year since I wrote a very honest post about my mental health and my experiences with seeking help and I just wanted to almost do a part 2 version of that post and a little update of where my life is at now. You can read last years here.
It was really hard to write about my struggles with my mental health and even harder to post but the feedback I received since has made it all worth while. I made my family read it and I feel like they understand me a little better. Through that I feel like I understand myself a little better too.
Since then I feel like I can talk about things better. I think once you start talking its easier to open up. My problem is I have high functioning depression and I have mastered pretending I'm ok. I can give tell tell signs but usually I just appear distant or pissed off. But I'm getting better at telling people when I'm not ok. Mostly because I don't want to feel bad whereas the old me would allow myself to continue to feel shit because I felt I deserved it. I now completely avoid all self destructive behaviours, I know that I deserve good things and love. I don't allow negative people in my life and I shower myself with self love and do more of the things that make me happy.
I'm still taking medication but I moved careers into a less mentally draining atmosphere, I work 20 less hours than I used to and I have a structure to my days and weeks.
I'm not cured. I don't think I ever will be as I don't really believe in cures anyhow. But I have really good weeks and I have bad ones. I just take every day as it comes and try not to be too hard on myself.
I think over the last year more and more people are talking about mental health. I feel like the world is a little more educated and its becoming less of a stigma.
There's still a long way to go but its definitely a start.
If you need help or guidance with your mental health visit Mind's website here.