Saturday, 21 March 2015

5 Things That Changed My Life



In my little life I have had some amazing things happen to me and equally I've had some pretty shit things happen to me but they have shaped me to be who I am today. I try to look at everything as a lesson and something positive regardless of what it. If you look at negative things in a positive way and they will no longer be negative: 

1. Leaving my home town: 

I moved away from home when I had literally just turned 18. I was from a small seaside town that I barely ever ventured out of and then I got thrust into the world of uni. I was quite naive, very narrow minded and very young. But it was the best thing I've ever done. 

I now have lived in Chester for 6 nearly 7 years which is absolutely crazy. I've become a strong, independent person that I actually like and have become comfortable in my own skin. I recommend anybody who feels like they need to get away to just do it. University is easily the easiest way to do so. Or save up loads of money and just go. 

Every person is different and every experience is different. It hasn't been easy and I'm a person who's so close to my family so it has been tough being so far away all the time but I wouldn't change a thing.

2. Meeting Amy: 

I met Amy in my second year of uni. I had been seeing an ex on and off and found she had been also. One night a mutual friend introduced us and it felt like I'd met my soul mate. We reinacted John Tucker must die and it gave me faith in women kind that we don't all have to hate each other for banging the same guy. In so many ways we were so similar but also completely different. I was stuck up and a stick in the mud and she was carefree and fun. She introduced me to pretty much all my friends that I have now and changed the entire way I look at life and people. 

3. Getting dumped:

I've been in what I would call 2 serious ish relationships in my lifetime and in both cases I was broken up with. The first was my first love who completely broke my heart. I remember when it first happened I couldn't physically watch anything with love in. The only thing I couldn't stomach was two and a half men. I really felt like I'd never get over it or meet anyone else. It took a couple of years for me to let go properly but I did and that pain and hurt pushed me to do better.

 I was in my last year of sixth form at the time and to distract myself I studied non-stop and I looked forward to uni and I found the more I kept myself distracted the better I was. 

The second was last year and I lived with him, they moved on so quickly, handled the break up like a child and I had to see them every single day but it made me so fucking strong and now looking back on it it wasn't the happy little life saving relationship I thought it was. I recently saw him and told him the best thing he ever did for me was breaking up with me and I truly believe that. My life is now the happiest and the best it has ever been and it wouldn't be that way if we were still together.

Sometimes things don't always seem like a blessing at first. Give it time.


4: Working as a waitress:

 As a teenager I had what I now know is anxiety. I always just thought I was shy but I had a stutter and I'd get panicky when people spoke to me, go red in the face and sweat out of every pore. I never made eye contact with people and I had constant social interaction fear.

I began waitressing when I was 16 and I vividly remember my first shift. The entire day I was panicking and worrying about having to speak to people and what if I dropped stuff or fell over. In the end it wasn't so bad but I had that same fear for about a year. So bad that sometimes I'd call in sick just so I wouldn't have to interact with people. But gradually I became much more confident and now even though I'm still an introvert at heart I can be confident in social situations and I don't worry. Being a waitress again at the age of 20 turned into me becoming an assistant manager everything I am today is because I was once a waitress.

People look at waitressing as an easy job or something that's shameful but it's honestly one of the hardest jobs I've ever done. Standing on your feet all day having to go up to total strangers and talk and be super confident whilst working in the most stressful environment and pretending to be happy 24/7. So be nice to waitresses when you go to restaurants you have no idea how hard their days been. 

5: My nephew being born:

 Before my nephew was born I had been a bit of a party animal and very reckless. The day I found out I was going to be an auntie was Christmas Day 2011 and I cried instantly. It's weird but when I knew that I was going to have a nephew I instantly felt like I had something to live for which I hadn't previously. Even though I did, it just didn't feel like that but now I had a whole little person who's life I wanted to stick around for. So I sorted myself out. Got a job, stopped hanging out with the wrong crowd and started trying to be a good role model for him. The day I met him I fell completely in love and he's my favourite person in the entire world. I live away from home so I unfortunately don't see him as much I would like but when I do I make every second count.

And now I have a second niece or nephew on the way :)


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